I am nowhere comfortable in showing my weaknesses, especially in front of my girlfriend, my mom or close friends. For some reason, I feel it's not manly to do so. The word itself (weakness) makes me clinch my fists and want to fight as if I needed to prove the opposite. The American culture believes we are the best in everything (except soccer, but we're getting there), and if you are not a winner or humiliating your opponent, then you are soft. This is certainly not acceptable in our culture, especially as an athlete.
I for so long have had the "Heisman stance" on human weakness that it made it hard to even appreciate the glory God can receive through our brokenness. Have you ever asked yourself, "Why and who needs weaknesses and brokenness?" I, for one, always resolve to work harder, plan better, and to surround myself with better people, which is fine, but what happens when that fails?
Many of you don't know my soccer story other than knowing that for some reason I didn't play this year. I hear people all the time say "Why isn't Mr. Superstar playing anymore?" That's a great question and here is the answer... As a top leading player, captain, representing my state, region, having played overseas and the Costa Rican National team, with awards, recognition, and ambitions in the sport, life happened.
I suffered the loss of a very important person in my life that meant more than I could begin to express. A war began inside my soul and I didn't realize it. That very year I had set my goal to win the All-American award, score the most goals, and increase my reputation as a player, but none of them happened. As a matter of fact, I was released from the team with a bunch of other great players as the coach shifted the squad to fit another vision. Put yourself in my shoes...I had been credited with great potential for success and believed it was coming my way. Now imagine what was going through my head when my coach shook my hand and said, "thanks for all you have done, but I'm going to need your jersey."
The scariest realization came suddenly after the incident when I understood I had completely stiff armed Jesus and placed Him second after my sport and ambitions. I had made my passion an idol. The embarrassment I felt as teammates, ex-coaches, friends, and family would discover I had been dismissed crushed me, and pushed my self esteem to an all time low, after all what good am I if I'm not playing soccer? Along with the loss, disappointment and identity crisis came the glory of God and the understanding that it was time to place him where He belonged... the throne.
It's been hard to look back on a situation that brought me to one of my weakest moments in my life, but Jesus understood it needed to be done before He could start opening more doors for me to walk through. Through this situation and submitting myself to Him fully, came His voice... "MY POWER IS MADE PERFECT IN YOUR WEAKNESS. FOR WHEN YOU'RE AT YOUR WEAKEST, I AM AT MY STRONGEST."
So, what is weakness? If you look at the dictionary you will find the words "inadequate" and "defective", which is perfect because isn't that what we are? The word itself describes us. We must look at ourselves and honestly say that we/ humanity are broken, fallen, and imperfect, yet in our condition His strength, power and might gives us purpose, vision, and direction. So at the end of the day we can call it empowered weakness, can we not?
Think about the term empowered weakness. Was it not Jesus who said, "If you want to be first, be last; if you want to be great, be the least; if you want to lead, then serve; if you want to become rich, than become poor; if you want to become blessed, endure severe persecution; if you want to be mature, become like a child; if you want to live, be willing to die; if you want to save your life, then lose it; if you want to receive, then give"? So...if you want to be strong, let your WEAKNESS drive you to God and receive His strength.
I believe it's something that every one of us must face. Truth is we all have addictions: spiritual pride, pornography, arrogance, gossip, lust, and even misrepresenting the truth. I challenge you to dig inside yourself and find those addictions and take them to the "life saver".
I haven't arrived yet, but I'm learning and understanding that my weakness can be one of the most powerful tools in my life, so I will stand tall and boast in that realization. So if weakness is truly strength, I encourage you to lean on Him as you walk in it. Demonstrate to others the power that God has when you are at your most frail moments because you are truly strong when you are weak.
I for so long have had the "Heisman stance" on human weakness that it made it hard to even appreciate the glory God can receive through our brokenness. Have you ever asked yourself, "Why and who needs weaknesses and brokenness?" I, for one, always resolve to work harder, plan better, and to surround myself with better people, which is fine, but what happens when that fails?
Many of you don't know my soccer story other than knowing that for some reason I didn't play this year. I hear people all the time say "Why isn't Mr. Superstar playing anymore?" That's a great question and here is the answer... As a top leading player, captain, representing my state, region, having played overseas and the Costa Rican National team, with awards, recognition, and ambitions in the sport, life happened.
I suffered the loss of a very important person in my life that meant more than I could begin to express. A war began inside my soul and I didn't realize it. That very year I had set my goal to win the All-American award, score the most goals, and increase my reputation as a player, but none of them happened. As a matter of fact, I was released from the team with a bunch of other great players as the coach shifted the squad to fit another vision. Put yourself in my shoes...I had been credited with great potential for success and believed it was coming my way. Now imagine what was going through my head when my coach shook my hand and said, "thanks for all you have done, but I'm going to need your jersey."
The scariest realization came suddenly after the incident when I understood I had completely stiff armed Jesus and placed Him second after my sport and ambitions. I had made my passion an idol. The embarrassment I felt as teammates, ex-coaches, friends, and family would discover I had been dismissed crushed me, and pushed my self esteem to an all time low, after all what good am I if I'm not playing soccer? Along with the loss, disappointment and identity crisis came the glory of God and the understanding that it was time to place him where He belonged... the throne.
It's been hard to look back on a situation that brought me to one of my weakest moments in my life, but Jesus understood it needed to be done before He could start opening more doors for me to walk through. Through this situation and submitting myself to Him fully, came His voice... "MY POWER IS MADE PERFECT IN YOUR WEAKNESS. FOR WHEN YOU'RE AT YOUR WEAKEST, I AM AT MY STRONGEST."
So, what is weakness? If you look at the dictionary you will find the words "inadequate" and "defective", which is perfect because isn't that what we are? The word itself describes us. We must look at ourselves and honestly say that we/ humanity are broken, fallen, and imperfect, yet in our condition His strength, power and might gives us purpose, vision, and direction. So at the end of the day we can call it empowered weakness, can we not?
Think about the term empowered weakness. Was it not Jesus who said, "If you want to be first, be last; if you want to be great, be the least; if you want to lead, then serve; if you want to become rich, than become poor; if you want to become blessed, endure severe persecution; if you want to be mature, become like a child; if you want to live, be willing to die; if you want to save your life, then lose it; if you want to receive, then give"? So...if you want to be strong, let your WEAKNESS drive you to God and receive His strength.
I believe it's something that every one of us must face. Truth is we all have addictions: spiritual pride, pornography, arrogance, gossip, lust, and even misrepresenting the truth. I challenge you to dig inside yourself and find those addictions and take them to the "life saver".
I haven't arrived yet, but I'm learning and understanding that my weakness can be one of the most powerful tools in my life, so I will stand tall and boast in that realization. So if weakness is truly strength, I encourage you to lean on Him as you walk in it. Demonstrate to others the power that God has when you are at your most frail moments because you are truly strong when you are weak.
Now that I think of it... weakness is actually an empowering word isn't it?
Russell Gaither
Russell Gaither
